So, this is a lot more personal than your typical post. But, at Hotwire, we pride ourselves on being real and honest. So here goes...
I read this blog post the other day after a morning where my carefully organized 6am call to finish at 6:45am when the kids wake up as my husband was away got delayed to 6:45am - yes, just as the kids woke up. Cue trying to get them fed for breakfast and ready for school, while trying to sound like someone who knows her shit.
I think I held it together but honestly it didn't make me feel good. Either as a mom, or as a business leader. And then I read this. And cried.
The rage v guilt is real. I am proud of my job. I am proud of being a mom. I am proof that you can have both if you work hard enough. But it doesn't mean that you will feel good about it.
But reading this article made me stop and realize that while these feelings aren't going to go away, I can push back. The next time someone asks me "who looks after the kids" or "I don't know how you manage kids and a job" I'll point them to this. And say "Doing this is taking care of my children, and I'm damn proud of how hard I work at both." And if they're a man, I'll ask them the same question straight back.
The truth is that I am indignant to be asked this question. It instantly galvanizes me to feel exponentially more feminist than I really am, biting my tongue not to answer the question with my own question: Do you ever ask the dads who is taking care of their children? But the truth behind my indignation is that the question scratches at the door of my greatest insecurity: Am I letting my kids down?